It seems that there are lots of people out there searching for elephant jokes, so we thought we’d oblige by pulling together 35 jokes about the biggest land animals. After some research, we actually found lots more than 35… but have decided to only share the funny ones!
We hope these elephant jokes make you laugh (or at least smile). Let us know what you think of them in the comments section below. And, of course. if you know a funny joke about elephants we’ll be happy to add it.
So with no further ado, let’s jump straight into these elephant jokes:
What was the elephant doing on the motorway?
About 10 mph
Why couldn’t the two elephants go swimming together?
Because they only had one pair of trunks!
How do you know an elephant is under your blanket?
Because when you get in your bed your nose touches the ceiling.
What do you get when an elephant sky dives?
A big hole.
What’s big and grey with horns?
An elephant marching band!
Why doesn’t the elephant use a computer?
Because it is afraid of the mouse!
Why can’t an elephant ride a bicycle?
Because he doesn’t have thumbs to ring the bell.
How do you stop an elephant from smelling?
Tie a knot in his trunk.
How do you prevent an elephant from charging?
Take away his credit card.
What is big, green, hangs in a tree and has a trunk?
An unripe elephant.
How do you eat an elephant?
One bite at a time.
What do you get if you cross an elephant and a fish?
Swimming trunks!
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
Great big holes all over Australia.
Why are elephants wrinkled?
Have you ever tried to iron one?
Why don’t elephants like playing cards in the jungle?
Because of all the cheetahs!
What do you call a elephant that never washes?
A smellyphant!
How do you make an elephant float?
You take 10 elephants, 10 tons of chocolate ice-cream, 5 tons of bananas…
What game do you NOT want to play with an elephant?
Squash!
What is the biggest ant in the world?
An elephant!
Why did the zookeeper refuse to work in the elephant enclosure?
Because the work kept piling up!
What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter?
An irrelephant
I bought my friend an elephant for his room.
He said “Thanks”
I said “Don’t mention it”
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a computer?
A 2 ton know it all.
How do elephants keep cool?
Ear conditioning!
Did you hear what’s big in Africa right now?
Elephants
Did you know that elephants can grow up to 11 feet?
But most just have 4.
Why did the elephants get kicked out of the pool?
Because their trunks kept falling down!
What did the elephant say to her son when he misbehaved?
“Tusk tusk!”
Why are elephants bad dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
Why did the elephant leave the circus?
He was tired of working for peanuts!
How do you raise a baby elephant?
With a forklift!
What did the elephant do to unwind after work?
He watched ele-vision!
What do elephants and trees have in common?
They both have big trunks
What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?
“I love you a ton!”
How do elephants talk to each other?
On the ele-phone!
What do you call an elephant in a telephone booth?
Stuck!
And that’s the end of our list of elephant jokes, what did you think – and laughing out loud? Or any elephant jokes you know of that we should add? Let us know in the comments section below!
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